Thursday, October 16, 2014


 I woke up today being grateful for the 2 little girls that God has given me.  My life with them after my divorce has been difficult. At time, I even wonder if it has been a punishment for my divorce.  But I know deep in my heart and soul that getting a divorce was the best thing for my girls. Why? Because they got the REAL ME AS A MOM.  A mom that no matter what I have been thru is a happy mom when she is with them. They might drive me nuts at times, where I would want some peace, but I would not trade it for anything in the world. My girls are my world. And I always knew that I had to be happy within myself to be the mom that I knew that I could be.  I knew that I had married a good and hard working man but I was not happy after several years.  I also knew that I loved him but not the way a wife should be "in Love" with a husband.  I preferred to see him happy with someone who really is in love with him instead of someone who is with him because "she is the mother to his children."  Sometimes, we feel that the best thing is to stay together for the kids, when in reality, some situations make it worse for the kids. What is truly important, is that the parents get along, work as a team & show their children how much they are loved, valued and teach them all that you can. The worse for kids is having a mom & dad constantly fighting, yelling, cursing, seeing no love between a man & woman, no team either as a married couple or a divorced couple.  But that is a whole different story to talk about....
It is funny because this past weekend I decided to take  away my oldest daughter's cell phone.  Yes! She felt her life was over and "wanted to die" but she has not even realized it herself yet, how she has already begun to change in a good way.  We as humans have become so wrapped up in having our cell phones become part of our wardrobe or part of our body that we do not even realize it.  Many of us go insane if something happens to our phone.  I know I have.  I have my pictures stored in it of my kids, I have all my contacts from friends to clients, I use it as my calculator, to check social media, to hear music, to read about the weather & what is happening in the world..... BUT I have and am trying to not have it as part of my hip.  I have it when I am working or during working hours and at times I leave it behind & even forget where I left it to the point that I need my "other half" to call me so I can find it....LOL!   I do not miss it at times, yet I do not rely on it quite as much. There was even a time when we sat down at the dinner table and each of us had our phones. Now, we sit at the table and just talk, leaving our phones elsewhere.  
And now it has even become easier since my teenagers do not have their phones - LOL!  I know they do not find it funny.

I am thankful on a daily basis for having a home, food, clothing, my kids, my other half, my family & friends.  I thank God daily for making me as strong as he has, enabling me to overcome so much.  This morning I held my daughter's hand as I drove her to school.  Before she got down I reminded her that I adore her & that I am here for her to talk.  She said I know & smiled.   I watched her walk away once more without her phone & her head was held up high looking at her surroundings & most probably just thinking, finding her thoughts & herself.   When I arrived at home, I sat by the lake, closed my eyes and thanked God.   I took in the beauty of mother nature as I closed my eyes, breathing in the air, feeling the sun & listening to the birds, as I visualized only the good that will be coming my way.
A weird thing I also thought about today, was that last night, my youngest daughter's cell phone "died!" Kaput! It no longer works! And boy,  oh boy, did she too think her life was over!  Funny thing was, I overheard her older sister tell her that she needed to make the best of it, that "it's not the end of the world" but she did know how she felt. 

Made me think...... My "little" one who is my character, my "mini-me," even told me that now without her cell phone, she would fall asleep in school. Can you imagine?  I told her that she should not even have it out in school, but she explained how she listens to her music when the teachers allow the students to have some "down time."  Another "hhhmmmm?" for me.
We shall see how this goes, but I will say, that I am starting to like these teenagers with no cell phones."  We have plans of watching a movie at home tonight after homework.  Last night, we watched TV ("The Voice") as a family.  

My goal is to try to get my girls to enjoy life better, with not so much technology - to enjoy their moments, their family, to laugh more, to go outside and feel the sun on their faces, etc....

We have another change coming soon and in that next phase, I would love to even get them to love the outdoors and learn to grow their own vegetables or garden. I have a goal and it is to teach my girls to enjoy more of their surroundings and life instead of being hooked on wireless!  And my other goal is for making this public, in the hopes that other parents will do the same and start dedicating more quality & smart time together because, believe me, we never know. We trust our children, we believe they will never do anything or get in any trouble, until one day either it happens to us, it happens to our best friend or we hear it elsewhere.  I just have seen too many kids where the parents do not want to be bothered with their kids & that is not how it should be.  Kids are not asked to be brought into this world!!!  We brought them!
Hope everyone has an Awesome Day!!! ~Ani
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