I watched how some of the moms watching their "figure skaters" cringed every time their skater did something wrong. I get it because I do the same thing on the "hockey side" but this time, I was an outside observer.
It is through this "outside" lens that I observed and learned that I must take this lesson with me to the "hockey side" and to life: to learn to give my children LOVE and SUPPORT and above-all, ENCOURAGEMENT and to remember that they are trying their best.
Sometimes, we forget how young and fragile they really are. It is usually our own hopes and dreams that we try to instill in them and then demand of them.
Here are some tips to remember to support & encourage your child:
TIPS:1. Be careful what you say. Kids can be sensitive to parents' and others' words.
2. Be a positive role model. Nurture your own self-esteem and they'll have a great role model.
3. Identify and redirect inaccurate beliefs. Helping kids set more accurate standards and be more
realistic in evaluating themselves will help them have a healthy self-concept.
4. Be spontaneous and affectionate. Your love will help boost your child's self-esteem. Give hugs
and tell kids you're proud of them when you can see them putting effort toward something or
trying something at which they previously failed.
5. Create a safe, loving home environment. Kids who don't feel safe or are abused at home are at
greatest risk for developing poor self-esteem. A child who is exposed to parents who fight and
argue repeatedly may feel they have no control over their environment and become helpless or
6. Remember that you are your child's best teacher. School, educational games and
television,shelf full of books all can't accomplish what you can in the education of your child.
7. Provide your child with free time. Children need plenty of free time to discover and explore.
Don't jam pack your schedule with errands and activities.
8. Over-praising kids does more harm than good. If you keep telling your child she is already
doing a fantastic job, you’re saying she no longer needs to push herself.
9. Encourage them to pursue their interests (fully.) Encourage children to take on tasks they
show interest in, then make sure they follow through to completion.
10. Don’t lose sleep over it. Parents think that struggles and failure will hurt their kids’
self-esteem, but it’s actually a golden opportunity to help build it.”
Remember, " Self-confidence rises out of a sense of competence. In other words, kids develop confidence not because parents tell them they're great, but because of their achievements, big and small."